


In Darkness we are revealed

by Madam_Violet



Series: The Vault Chronicles [5]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Missy tries to be strong, Nightmares, The Vault (Doctor Who), but she's too damaged
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2019-02-08 04:25:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12856707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madam_Violet/pseuds/Madam_Violet
Summary: Everything was fine during the first years Missy spent in the Vault. The Doctor should have guessed something wasn't right. When a tiny, unsignifiant incident causes Missy to break down, he realises how damaged she really is.





	In Darkness we are revealed

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write a fic about the early days in the Vault but had no idea of a plot.  
> So thank you to Meancatoal for your prompt !

After the Doctor took his oath, things went too quickly to let him grasp the situation. Of course, he had planned everything.

 

He knew the Shadow Proclamation laws concerning executions of criminals of a rare kin. He also knew procedures about Time Lords. The tradition was to burn the body to avoid access to the dead’s time stream, but it also had the side effect of letting the spirit free. So it had be decided that psychic species would be buried in secured quantic tombs and guarded for a certain amount of time. This last rule was beyond stupid, since Time Lords minds could virtually survive forever, but administration could be dumb. And Carnathon was all about administration. A killing factory without any feelings or cruelty.

 

For the moment, he had managed to trick Rafando with his words. It hadn’t been a difficult task, since the man couldn’t care less about Missy. As long as the prisoner wasn’t his charge anymore, and the papers were correctly filled, not his business.

Since he scared the coward man and his guards, he had a little time to move Missy to the Vault, helped by Nardole. Just enough time, however, to lay her in the cold marble coffin standing in the center of a force field. Since she would probably sleep for a few hours, he didn’t bothered himself leaving a light source or giving her a bit more comfort.

 

The next hours were spent filling ridiculous stack of papers, always avoiding details about Missy’s current state. Things would be so much easier if she was officially dead. Then, he had to move the Vault. Moving a quantum fold chamber was quite easy if you had a TARDIS to set up coordinates, but this particular one was locked on the planet. Not a big deal, it would mainly cause watery shadows being cast on the Vault doors in any place it would be settled. It would also mean the executioners would keep an access, but he doubt they would bother him. Your prisoner, your problem.

 

So the Doctor chose to settle in Bristol, 1945. Post war England, a strategic point in space and time. There, he would be able to live in his favourite country, favourite period without meeting any known face. He could find a job at the local university and give Missy a stable, comfortable life. River knew it, so she had sent Nardole to help with the domestic details. In her diary, she had left a small entry : _Hello, Sweetie. Don’t torment yourself too much about me. Everybody dies at one point. You need to care for someone, someone who needs you and makes you feel important. The two last Time Lords in existence at least reunited. Always be kind, always be fair, always be my Doctor._

Not that he needed those reminders, he would have saved Missy anyways, but it was good to feel supported by his wife.

 

A little bit more than a day had passed since he had put Missy in the Vault. The Doctor didn't feel her mind waking up yet. She was still in a dreamless sleep.

 

When everything was ready, Vault secured, access to the warehouse limited, tracks erased from Trochwood’s reach and many other mundane tasks completed, he finally went down to visit Missy. Nardole was following him, scared to death and yet full of bravado. His arms were full of blankets and pillows, everything to make the Time Lady comfortable when she would wake up.

 

They carefully opened the doors. The Vault was pitch black except for the faint glow of the force field. It was impossible to say how vast it was, but the Doctor would have bet at least the size of a small galaxy. The air was chilling too. Maybe some heaters would be useful. He had taken an office lamp with an unlimited battery to provide a little bit of light in the force field, but the rest of the Vault would remain dark until he’ll build some sort of walls to reduce space to more comfortable dimensions.

 

He was still fiddling with the bag of food, the books and the lamp when he heard Nardole let a high pitched shriek. He left his head in panic, to see what had startled his jumpy assistant.

 

Missy was very much awake.

 

Sitting very still in the coffin, her pale skin glowing blue under the buzzing beams, she looked pretty much like a vampire, or another of those silly human folklore living dead creatures. Her chilling blue eyes were staring into nothing, her mind blocked out with strong psychic defenses.

 

When she realised the Doctor was there, she jumped on the floor and rushed toward the glass-like wall. He smiled to her warmly and deactivated the force field, making Nardole whine in the distance.

 

“Sorry for making you wait. Are you okay ?”

“Perfectly fine” she answered faintly.

 

Her whole body language was saying otherwise, but she had just faced a permanent death by the hands of her only friend. She was probably in a state of shock. That would explain why she was blocking her thought like this.

 

The Doctor stepped inside the cage with the material and asked Nardole to close behind him with the sonic, trusting his friend to open it later. A lamp, blankets and food. It wasn’t the best setting, but he would soon make some works in there, to turn this dark tomb into a livable home. But for tonight, Missy would do with this little supply.

She didn’t say anything, just watched the doctor install the blankets and pillows inside the stone coffin.

 

“Here we are. It’s a little bit gloomy, I know, but it’s only for tonight. Tomorrow I’ll fetch you a nice bed.”

“Hey, it’s not like if you never slept in a tomb before” he added with a chuckle.

“It looks very comfy like this, like a bird nest” She muttered.

 

She was smiling too, inspecting one really fluffy blanket. Not a single time they looked at each other in the eyes. The situation was uneasy for both of them, but there wasn’t any trace of violence or rebellion. Good, thought the Doctor. Missy was being cooperative.

 

“Are you hungry ?”

“No, not really. I had a nice last meal on Carnathon.”

 

The Doctor remembered it was a tradition in most civilisations to indulge death row prisoners with last treats. He felt a little nauseous at the idea. But now Missy was safe and sound and the prison was only a bad memory. Why did he have to be so sensitive when it came to the Master ?

Nardole cleared his throat and the Doctor was taken out of his thoughts. Missy was already in her makeshift bed, still tired. He smiled softly at her and put the last bag on her lap.

 

“You have a few snacks if you are hungry. And don't get fooled by the bottle size, it contains far enough tea. Poppy and caramel, you'll like it.”

 

She had already hid her face in the pillows. The Doctor rearrange the blankets and left the Vault with Nardole. He didn't know what made feel him worst : treating Missy like a stray cat or her subdued attitude. No previous Master would have reacted this way, all humble and grateful for basic comfort and food. He suddently wanted to hug her and promise her a beautiful future for the next thousand years, but he was aware that things would be difficult even with the best intentions.

 

The works in the Vault were quickly achieved thanks to highly advenced equipment and transdimensionnal technology available. He had try to follow most of Missy's requests, avoiding the fanciest or most dangerous ones. No swimming pool or fireplace for obvious security reasons. But a large bathtube was okay. The result was funny looking : lots of wood with pretty sculpting, a gallery, an indoor garden and big windows. For the night, the large space was lit by numerous lamps of all styles : old chandeliers, office lamps, bed lamps... Even the containment field had found an aesthetic fonction, as a minimalist gazebo harbouring a little lounge space. It was indeed a very nice prison, and Missy seemed delighted.

 

 

The first remarkable incident happened after a few years. Missy wasn't a difficult charge to look after : she was well behaved and independent. Thinking about it, it wasn't surprising since she had practically begged the Doctor to take her with him back in the graveyard.

 

The Doctor was reading a newspaper in his office, sipping tea. It was only eight PM, but night was already perfectly dark. The students papers were all marked, Nardole had taken Missy's diner to the Vault and he might sleep a little tonight, because even a Time Lord needed a good nap after a long week of exams. As he was already dozing off, he suddently jumped awake.

 

“A problem, sir ?”

“Missy's not feeling right.”

 

He took his psychic paper out of his pocket and watched it getting filled with incoherent English, French and Gallifreyan. None of those thoughts were send on purpose and the Doctor could tell her psychic barriers had shattered, letting all the chaos spilling out of her head.

 

“She was perfectly fine when I saw her, though.”

“Well, she'n not fine now. How can you not feel it ? She's screeming for help with all her mind !”

 

The Doctor and Nardole rushed to the Vault, unsure of what was going on. The alarms didn't ring, and no anomaly was detected, except for a short-circuit in internal electricity.

The Vault interior was pitch black. Using his sonic, the Doctor turned the artificial sunlight on. He scanned the large room warily, while Nardole began fumbling with the electric equipment. Missy was curled in a tight ball on the ground, shaking and hyperventilating.

 

“It's okay, I'm here. What happened ?”

 

Missy didn't answered, all her words being stuck in her sobbing chest. The Doctor kneeled by her side and began coaxing her to the bed. She didn't even seemed to aknowledge his presence. Her mind was overhelmed with panic. He was stroking her hair in an attempt of soothing her when Nardole cleared his throat.

 

“The problem is solved, sir. An old lamp caused the short-circuit. I removed it, now electricity should work.”

“Thanks. Please, put the night setting back. I'll stay with Missy.”

“Sir, is it a good idea ? You shouldn't be alone with...”

“What are you afraid of ? She's been perfectly safe for years, and tonight she's feeling really bad.”

 

Nardole didn't add anything and just did as he was said. When he turned off the day setting, Missy whimpered. The Doctor played softly with her hair, whispering an old Gallifreyan lullabye. He tried to read her mind but was unable to decipher what he was happening. She was in a state of complete panic, her mind hurting and billowing frantically like a swarm of bees stuck in a room on fire.

 

“Shhh, Missy. It's okay, you are in the safest place in the universe, with the people who care the most about you. Try to calm down and tell me what happened.”

 

Missy left her head and watched the Doctor with pure despair. Her beautiful clear blue eyes were wide and soaked. The Doctor ran his thumb along her cheek, drawing circles on her cold skin.

 

“Please, leave the sunlight. I don't like night. It's dark, and cold, and so dark.” She was half choking with her words, like a little Time Tot.

“I can't, Missy. You need those cycles for your health. It's already bad enough to be cut from the outside world in a quantum fold.”

“I need a new lamp to replace the broken one. It's really really dark here.”

 

The Doctor sighted. Missy's room was already too luminous to be comfortable.

 

“You have lots of light with those chandeliers.”

“Not in that corner, over there.”

“You don't need light in that corner, there's nothing there.”

“I don't like it when it's dark.”

 

The Doctor nodded and called Nardole, asking him to bring a lamp. Missy's state was worrysome. Thinking about it, he wasn't really surprised. She had been really tame for almost ten years, but she had always kept her mind out of reach. He had first interpreted that as a sign of power, to prove he might keep her body captive, her mind was still free. She had such an impressive dignity when it came to accept her fate.

But maybe she had kept her mind shut all those years because she wanted to block out the madness, the fear and the suffering. The Doctor was hit by guilt thinking about all his incompetence had caused to Missy.

 

“Nardole's coming with a lamp, Missy. Do you want to talk to me ?”

 

She nodded, then buried her face in the Doctor's shirt. He thighened his hold, trying to warm her up. She was so cold. Time Lords were almost cold blooded, of course, but that didn't mean they didn't enjoy warmth.

Nardole arrived with the lamp and a hot bottle of tea and a few snacks. The Doctor thanked him and kept rocking Missy against him until her body relaxed.

 

“Are you okay, now ?”

“Mmmh, it feels nice.”

 

She seemed sleepy and the Doctor wondered for how long she hadn't slept. The Master almost never slept. It was usually the first thing his wardens noticed when he was kept in UNIT prisons. The Doctor smiled to himself thinking about good old times before the War. Before they were broken.

 

“You should try to sleep, you seem exhausted.”

“I'm not a weak little human, Doctor.”

“Even Time Lords need sleep, you know.”

 

Missy pouted and turned her back. The Doctor took her by her shoulders and looked at her in the eyes, all eyebrows and frowny.

“I'm serious, Missy. I'm concerned about your health. That break down you had earlier, it's not like you to freak out because of an electricity cut. I need to understand what's going on.”

 

Missy looked properly ashamed of herself and the Doctor felt bad for humiliating her that way. Keeping her here was sad enough without treating her like a toddler on top of that. But she looked pale, and so tired. She needed help and was to proud to seek out for it.

 

“I hate darkness. You can never know what is waiting in darkness.”

“I promise you there are no Vasha Neradas in your room” teased the Doctor with a playful smile.

“And there is absolutely nothing you have to fear. But you already know that.”

 

Missy nodded eagerly, still wrapped in the fluffy blanket, not so fluffy anymore, she had chosen on her first night here. The Doctor hated to notice how childish Missy was. Her previous self was childish, and almost every Masters before them, actually. But they were the good kind of childish, the kind of “never serious on purpose”. Missy's childishness, otherwise, was more some sort of a regression. He already seen that before the Vault. How clingy she was, and totally unable to build a functionnal plan. Her Nethersphere stuff never made any sense.

 

“We should turn off a few lights, so you would get accustomised to darkness. It's not good for you to sleep with all those lights on. If you never turned off the light since you live here, it's not a surprise you look so tired.”

“Please, no. I don't want to be in the dark.”

 

She was begging. That simple realisation broke the Doctor's hearts. Worst, she was begging for something so small and so stupid.

 

“I'm staying with you, alright. It's not pitch black, the windows still emit a very faint moonlight. Your eyes will adapt by themselves. And more important, this is your home. You've been living here for almost ten years. You should know each corner perfectly.”

“When it's dark I'm not sure anymore I'm here” she whispered.

“You need to learn how to keep calm in the dark. Imagine you have another cut when we're not here.”

“What do you mean by not here. You're meant to be here all the time, you took an oath !”

“I'm here all the time. Simply, I happen to give lectures, or go to the movies. Same for Nardole. Well, it's worse with Nardole, he actually has friends and a social life.”

Missy smiled at the Doctor's self mockery.

 

“You need to face your fears. We all have fears, some more rational than others. Your fear of the dark is not rational and you can get over it. I know you can.”

 

Missy nodded, still clinging to the Doctor, wrapped in her favourite blanket. She wanted to be brave, it was written in her eyes. With his sonic, he turned off a few lamps, leaving only one chandelier for a dimmed light. It was true, the Vault was pretty big and it was enough to create agoraphobia. If Missy couldn't get over her nocturnal terrors, maybe a smaller bedroom next the main living space would be an option. But for the moment she needed to try.

 

“Can we try to sleep, now ?”

“Yes, but you sleep with me.”

 

The Doctor joined Missy in the bed. It was the first time he slept so close from his old friend for such a long time. Last time they were Time Tots in an old barn, terrified by a war that now seemed like a playground riot. Now they where grown ups, a man and a woman. He felt a little bit embarrassed, but she felt so good in his arms. He could sense her mind, so closed and hardened by years of self preservation melting slowly as she curled against him. Her head safely buried under his chin, she was once again overwhelmed by the drumming. She was so small, like if that body of hers was meant to be protected and kept safe.

 

She soon felt asleep, so the Doctor followed her.

 

_Darkness. Cold. Loneliness. Deafening silence. Fear. So much fear. I don't want to stay here. Doctor, save me. Take me back home. I'm lost. I don't know where I am. I'm lost._

 

The Doctor was soon awaken from his sleep by Missy's silent screams of agony. She wasn't really asleep. She was in a crisis of sleep paralysis. Shaking her was useless. Her body wouldn't respond anyways. Was she aware of her surroundings ?

 

“Missy, do you here me !”

_Doctor, you're here. Am I dead ? Why am I dead ? I was alive, wasn't I ?”_

“You're alive. You are just having a very bad nightmare.”

 

_I'm not sleeping. I hear you, I feel I'm awake. But I'm not in my body. And time is weird. I can't regenerate. I'm trying but it doesn't work._

“Sleep paralysis. Even humans can experience it. You won't regenerate. Just calm down and it will be over. Breath slowly. Can you feel my touch ?”

_Yes, I feel something. I'm scared, I can't move._

“It will come back. Just calm down.”

_Who is it with you ?_

“Nobody. We're alone, Missy.”

_You lie. I feel them, they want to hurt me._

“It's only in your head. Shhh, it's alright. You are in your bed, I'm with you and you're going to wake up. When you wake up, we'll have tea and snacks. I can see a jar of Nutella in the bag Nardole gave me. I keep talking, alright ?”

 

Missy stired slowly, her fingers softly clenching, then her whole body awakening. She finally opened her eyes and took heavy gulps of air, like a drawning woman miraculously taken out of the water. She looked broken to the core. Without thinking, the Doctor took her in his arms and began stroking her hair, giving her kisses.

 

“I'm here, sweetheart. As I promised.”

“Doctor !”

 

She tightened her grip around him, burying her tears flooded face in his neck. The Doctor rocked her softly, silently soothing her. He didn't know what was worst, realising he just called the Master “sweetheart” or the fact she seemed to need to be pampered like a small child. He felt so guilty for letting things going this far. If he had been more careful, he could have help her before she snapped. But he was too satisfied with her self control and her easiness. He didn't even tried to go further and examine her scars.

 

“Do you want tea ?”

“Is it poppy and caramel ?”

 

The Doctor gave her a quizzical look. He hadn't buy any poppy and caramel tea for years and did't even knew Missy liked it so much.

 

“Why poppy and caramel ?”

“You gave me poppy and caramel tea when I woke up. I thought I was dead and you brought me poppy and caramel tea.”

 

He wasn't sure to understand, and Missy's thoughts were still out of reach. When she woke up ?

 

“When did I gave you that tea ? You know, it's Nardole who makes you tea, usually.”

“The first day !” Missy was growing agitated.

“When I accidently left you in the dark.”

 

Suddently all of this made sense and the Doctor realised how much it was his fault. He never realised hwo traumatising it must had been for her to wake up in her own coffin, in the dark and all alone. She must had felt buried alive.

 

“I thought I was dead” she choked in sobs. “I thought I was dead, but I was very conscious and I could move. I thought my body was going to decay again, and that I would never see the sun again because in a thousand years I'd be dust. I could already feel... I could already feel myself rotting from inside.”

 

She curled in a tight ball, shaking and whimpering. The Doctor took her in his arms.

 

“It's okay, sweetie. You're not dying. You're perfectly safe here. I won't ever abandon you. Never, I swear.”

“Sometimes I feel like I'm dead.”

“It's only a nightmare, love. Nothing more than a nightmare. If you ever have this nightmare again, think very hard about me, and I promise I'll come, even if I'm at the other side of the Universe fighting a cyber army. Not that I'm going to do this during the next thousand years.”

 

Missy nodded and let the Doctor pour her a cup of tea. While she was drinking, he prepared some Nutella toast.

 

“Chocolate makes Dementors go away” whispered Missy.

“Nice reference, sweetie. You like Harry Potter ?”

“Bellatrix is cool. I like her hair and her voice.”

 

She seemed happier now. Once again, the Doctor felt like the first day, when he had brought her the blankets and the cold meal and she was ridiculously grateful. At the moment he didn't understand but now he thought he did. She needed someone to care for her. All those years she must have felt alone. The Master was a loner, but Missy was different. She needed company. Not only company, but care and affection. Being a prisoner only made this need stronger because she was dependant on him.

 

“Missy, thank you for telling me. I know it's hard to talk about those sort of things.”

“No, thanks for listening to a madwoman like me.”

“If I can deserve to be called the Doctor for once, I do my best for you.”

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Nightmare fic with a twist !  
> I'm not an expert with nightmares, but sleep paralysis sucks. I know it's easy to say it awake, but in case of sleep paralysis, DO NOT PANIC. Panicking will only make it worse.


End file.
